(For Jenny Poulakos)
I am the queen, make no mistake
I am the queen of my being
I have complete and utter control
over my soul, and my emotions
I am the queen and I expect
the best, to treat myself with no less
than disciplined respect
Make no mistake, I need no man
to tell me that I can, or I can do
that I can be, or to satisfy me
The Queen is capable of all that
On her own, she has her inner slaves
Worshipping, taking care of her body
Feeding, breeding her mind, body, soul
The Queen is happy on her own
A busy bee building her own castle
She Rules her own kingdom
And in matters of the heart
She falls in love, with herself
Hearts and hearts all round
And she won’t lift a finger
For anyone other than the King
That will sit idly by her side
And won’t run off and hide
Because she’s got no time to play
Please would you just go away!
I can’t be bothered with the game!
I just want to sleep
Watch a DVD
I don’t care if your on your knees
With a hundred diamonds rings
If you’re not the King for me
Then move on please
I have places to be
And a whole lot of time
To spend inside of me
And when her Greek parents
Say they have found a man for her
She tells them GO AWAY, God dammit
Don’t you see, I don’t need a man
I am a woman – W O M A N
I am the Queen, of my being
Here me, I am the Queen
I am my Queen
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I have never wanted
to suck cock
because it’s so wrong
and I’m a good Greek girl
but lately I’m obsessed
with the thought
of your cock
Nailing you to the wall
crawling down, unzip
pants to the ground
gently taking you out
lick along your shaft
stroke your balls
kiss your thighs
hear your sighs
tease you, relieve you
play, play, oh, play
I want to suck you dry
I don’t know why
I don’t want you to hide
between my thighs
I want your cock
Inside my mouth
To go under your desk
while you’re at work
amongst all your paperwork
you scrunching the brief
inside your fist
or against the wall
in your apartment
or in the shower
fucking my mouth
and I want nothing else
my hands scrambling
for my cunt because I can’t
I have to touch myself
so wet at what I’m doing
you losing control
mumbling, muttering
that if I don’t stop
you are going to come
and then you won’t
pleasure me
but don’t you see
I don’t care
I won’t stop
I just want
to suck you dry
stop asking why!
hear your moan
yell out, shout out
CUM CUM CUM
in my mouth
I want to
SWALLOW
lick you dry
till you’re calm
again
If you enjoyed this then please buy a copy of Love and Fuck Poems. It’s only $10 and you will be helping support my art!
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It’s nice receiving fan email, especially from women that connect with the writing and see themselves in it. Fan mail from men is good too, although I do feel a little uncomfortable when I receive it because of the sexual content in Love and Fuck Poems. Thanks so much to the male who will remain anonymous (and for their permission to share this) who wrote this at work, scanned it and emailed it to me. It’s my most memorable fan mail to date and is SO Melbourne. I wonder if he was raeding Love and Fuck Poems while driving a train OR if I can get free metcards?????????
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2 Comments
- Did you hear about ******?
- Finally, he saw the light.
- Hope I never get divorced.
- Relax, it’s not like you’re abnormal like her.
- LOL, she is IS abnormal.
- I mean, seriously, it’s not like we’re surprised. I mean, remember when they first got together. I told her, I told her straight out I said ‘******, you’re so fucking lucky someone like ****** wants to be with someone like you’ because he’s gold, man
- He’s perfect
- I know, and she’s…
- LOL. Well she was always a bit weird but now she’s just totally taken things to the extreme
- She’s lost the plot
- Totally, and then she wonders why people have taken a step back from her like HELLO, get with the program
- I was telling her when she started writing all those years ago that it was a bad idea
- I was too!
- High five!
[High five]
- I said, ‘******, who’s gonna care what you say, seriously’ and she got all pissed off at me, whatever, I mean now, she’s striping all her clothes off and that book of hers, those fuck poems…
- Did you buy a copy?
- As if I would. And I’d never go to one of her shows. I’d rather go to the dentist.
- The only reason why it’s selling is because it’s sex
- Her poor parents…
- I know…
- Her mum was rushed to hospital the other day
- Fuck off
- Yeah. She nearly had a heart attack. It’s all the stress she puts them through
- Fuck, is she gonna be okay?
- I think so. She’s totally ruined their lives.
- GOD, why can’t she be normal, man?
- I don’t know. And her latest You Tube video. Someone asked me about it the other day, they were like ‘man, what’s going on with, ******’ and I was so embarrassed, because she’s family and I was like ‘I don’t know, man’
- She’s lost it. I don’t get it. She got a double degree in business, had the best job in programming and she threw it all away, her job, her marriage, everything, for the writing. You know, she’s going to wake up one day and regret everything, and then it’s gonna be too late.
- For sure. Did you hear she tried to get ****** back?
- Fuck off
- Yep. I’m not surprised. Went to get a big dose of reality and came running back.
- Obviously he didn’t want her.
- I don’t blame him.
- And he’s got his new girlfriend. He got together with her pretty quickly after ******
- Well he deserves a bit of happiness in his life after ******
- Totally.
- It’s going to be a hard life for ******
- I know
- When was the last time you saw her?
- Man, I don’t see her except for when she shows her face at family things
- I told you I went to her place once?
- No!
- Yeah. It’s like in a nice spot in Brunswick but when I saw it I was like ‘oh, ******’ in my head, like you have fallen from the graces, from a big, beautiful house in Pascoe Vale to this…I didn’t want to say shit-hole but it’s so small and the walls are cracked, and it’s old, and there’s no backyard…oh, poor little *****, she’s the one that’s going to suffer
- She’s such a cute little thing..
- Yeah…
- And you know some of her poems about wogs and stuff, they’re like, total bullshit. Our culture isn’t like that.
- She doesn’t know where to draw the line! If she could hear us now she’d write a poem about it and put it on her website.
- Totally.
- I hated the poem she wrote, what was it…? Oh, yeah, ‘love according to wogs’. That wogs only love you when you do what they want
- I know, I read it too. She took it down from her website, you know.
- Really?
- Yeah, I was looking for it the other day and I couldn’t find it.
- I wonder why…
- Anyway, it’s total bullshit. I mean, I may not agree with what she does but I love her, I mean, she’s family, man
- Me too. And I love my culture
- High five
[High five]
- It’s almost like she prefers to be an Aussie
- She hangs out with them now I heard
- No way I’d hang out with K.As*, no way
- LOL
- Well, I reckon she’s gonna have lots of regrets in the future, but by that time it’ll be too late, she will have lost everything and everyone
- Well, you make your bed you lie in it
- That’s right
- If she just tried a bit harder to be normal, if she took a break from the writing, but she doesn’t even try
- She doesn’t.
- It’s sad..really sad
- I know…
* KAs: kolo afstrali Australian bumbs
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The following article has been cross posted at Overland literary journal. It looks better on their website, more poetic. I encourage you to click on over there to get the full experience.
Photo by Art of the State Filmworks, concept Jenny Poulakos
Sometimes I get so tired of words. They pour out of me. It is not words that I lack. It is the discipline to arrange the words in a way that best articulates what it is I am trying to say. I’m trying to tear down walls, layers and layers of walls. Emotional walls, cultural walls, female walls, writing and publishing industry walls. But sometimes it’s best just to shut up and say everything you want to say in a single photo. So I’m going to keep this post brief, and let the photo say the rest.
After the debate here on Overland in response to my post ‘Poetry or Pornography’ I had a long think about things. I do that a lot. Sometimes I comment or post things that I regret later. There are a lot of things I want to say but I am only going to stick with one and let the photo say the rest. Many people ask me, why Ben? And the reason is simple, and there is no need for me to bring feminist theories into it and get all political. I am drawn to his honesty because I too am an honest writer. I am drawn to his artistic freedom because I too follow the same philosophy. The question is not whether or not Ben is sexist. The question is what kind of society do we live in that Ben, an honest, decent man, is writing what he is writing.
This photo shoot, conceptualised by Jenny Poulakos, photographed by Art of the State Filmworks with hair and makeup by Kaliopi Malamas, was executed with the literature both Ben and I have created in mind, and the chemistry that brings both of us together. All parties involved are familiar with mine and Ben’s work and intentions. The full series can be seen on Ben’s website, Horrorsleazetrash. This photo was also chosen to promote the gig Ben and I are doing together at Polyester books on Friday 11.11.11 at 7:30pm. Just as we did at the launch of my poetry chap book, Love and Fuck Poems (which has been picked up by a Cypriot publisher to be translated into Greek), Ben and I will once again engage in a poetry war, poem for poem, only this time we will be taking the poetry out onto Brunswick Street, to the people. The gig has been promoted by RRR and in Beat magazine where the photo was featured on their home page when our interview was first published.
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The following poem has been censored for legal/censorship reasons:
He’s the YES MAN, the TEST MAN
push-the-button-and-he’ll-attest MAN
Took me *** ***** to write this poem
but I’m bloody-well writing it, man
You’re the YES MAN
snatch-the-first-chick-that-comes-along MAN
Broken, battered and bruised
you’re the woo-her-to-the-***** MAN
Suicidal and on pills, it just gives you the thrills
You’re the RESCUE MAN
take-her-from-one-prison-to-the-next MAN
You’re the ****-**-**** MAN
Make-it-out-like-it’s-all-my-fault MAN
You’re too broken you can’t see broken, man
You think you’re the LOVE MAN
the self-sacrifice MAN
the give-without-take MAN
but you’re the WALL MAN
the STALL MAN
you accuse me of not knowing who I am
you’re the blank-canvas MAN
sprayed with the *****
your *** almost bled
when your Dad ****** *** *** * ****
You think you’re the UNLUCKY MAN
Because you’re getting *******
But you’re the wounded man
Repeating-the-mistakes-of-your-parents MAN
You’re the delusional MAN
Took-the-next-girl-that-came-along
and now you’re saying yes to her, man
Didn’t even wait for me to find myself
Yet you declare you love me so much
You’re love was empty, man
Self serving, man
And I knew this, man
That’s why I had the balls to leave, man
When I had nobody ********* me
and everyone ********** you
You never asked me to stay, man
You never fought for us, man
Because you didn’t like me, man
You don’t even like me, man!
You are just the YES MAN
You couldn’t stop saying YES, man
The YES defines your existence
You say YES with persistence
And when your yeses wouldn’t blitz it
that’s when you would schitz it
You think you could escape my words
It took me *** ***** to write this poem
and I’m fucking writing it now
You’re the DISEMPOWERING MAN
the feel-tall-when-she’s-small MAN
You say I don’t know who I am
that I don’t know what I want
But it is you who are the broken one, man
The-doomed-to-repeat-the-same-mistakes MAN
Blinded by the love that you emit
You will never see the light, man
You say I don’t know who I am
But I know very well who I am
It is you who doesn’t know
You just want to preach that I don’t know
so you can keep up the show
amongst *** ****** and ******
so I can be the sinner
and you can be the winner
But I can stand taller than you, man
And I’ll survive this, man
The truth always comes out, man
I’ll learn from my mistakes, man
But will you?
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2 Comments
It’s nice receiving fan email, especially from women that connect with the writing and see themselves in it. Fan mail from men is good too, although I do feel a little uncomfortable when I receive it because of the sexual content in Love and Fuck Poems. Thanks so much to the male who will remain anonymous (and for their permission to share this) who wrote this at work, scanned it and emailed it to me. It’s my most memorable fan mail to date and is SO Melbourne. I wonder if he was raeding Love and Fuck Poems while driving a train OR if I can get free metcards?????????
Tearing down walls
November 10, 2011 at 6:32 am (Creative commentary) (art of the state filmworks, ben john smith, jenny poulakos, kaliopi malamas, love and fuck poems, overland literary journal, poem, Poems (PG rated), polyester books)
The following article has been cross posted at Overland literary journal. It looks better on their website, more poetic. I encourage you to click on over there to get the full experience.
Photo by Art of the State Filmworks, concept Jenny Poulakos
Sometimes I get so tired of words. They pour out of me. It is not words that I lack. It is the discipline to arrange the words in a way that best articulates what it is I am trying to say. I’m trying to tear down walls, layers and layers of walls. Emotional walls, cultural walls, female walls, writing and publishing industry walls. But sometimes it’s best just to shut up and say everything you want to say in a single photo. So I’m going to keep this post brief, and let the photo say the rest.
After the debate here on Overland in response to my post ‘Poetry or Pornography’ I had a long think about things. I do that a lot. Sometimes I comment or post things that I regret later. There are a lot of things I want to say but I am only going to stick with one and let the photo say the rest. Many people ask me, why Ben? And the reason is simple, and there is no need for me to bring feminist theories into it and get all political. I am drawn to his honesty because I too am an honest writer. I am drawn to his artistic freedom because I too follow the same philosophy. The question is not whether or not Ben is sexist. The question is what kind of society do we live in that Ben, an honest, decent man, is writing what he is writing.
This photo shoot, conceptualised by Jenny Poulakos, photographed by Art of the State Filmworks with hair and makeup by Kaliopi Malamas, was executed with the literature both Ben and I have created in mind, and the chemistry that brings both of us together. All parties involved are familiar with mine and Ben’s work and intentions. The full series can be seen on Ben’s website, Horrorsleazetrash. This photo was also chosen to promote the gig Ben and I are doing together at Polyester books on Friday 11.11.11 at 7:30pm. Just as we did at the launch of my poetry chap book, Love and Fuck Poems (which has been picked up by a Cypriot publisher to be translated into Greek), Ben and I will once again engage in a poetry war, poem for poem, only this time we will be taking the poetry out onto Brunswick Street, to the people. The gig has been promoted by RRR and in Beat magazine where the photo was featured on their home page when our interview was first published.
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